Scientifically Talkin’ Smack

How to Talk Smack, as a Scientist

Just because you’re a data-parsing, executable-compiling, T-test-running, WOW-playing, Erdos-number-computing, twitter-posting GEEK doesn’t mean you can’t be more like Dolemite.  So sit back, take a real good octal dump, cause you are about to learn how to talk smack like a scientist.  We’ll get you started off with a heaping pile of dorkadelic nerdy snaps:

My paper’s been cited more times than Bono’s been knighted.

Yo mamma’s so fat, that when she does calculus, instead of “dx” she uses “d XXL”

Yo mamma’s starring in a new movie, “Lord of the Onion Rings”

Yo mamma so fat, even the supermassive black hole at the galactic center said, “damn that’s a fat ass!”

Yo mamma so fat, she ain’t carbon-based, she’s gravy based.

Getting yo mamma to leave the buffet is such a hard problem, it’s NP complete.

Ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny, bitch!